I spent a lot of time wandering around my house yesterday. At home, alone, and restless. Watching Netflix seemed like a good option. Why do housework, as it never ends, and I don’t enjoy it anyways. Thoughts were disjointed…and I could feel myself sinking into a funk. Maybe a nap would help? No…
What was different about yesterday if I compare it to last week? On the surface, nothing is really different. Life is good. The future seems bright enough. I have faith…and it seems intact. Then why are my thoughts so far removed from Jesus?
It was finally figured out this morning. Took me awhile. It became apparent that I haven’t spent any time seeking Jesus in the last few days. I have been quite busy, and the quiet time is usually the first thing to be sacrificed.
What a difference it made in my day! And how easy it is to fall into these old habits. Coasting on last week’s blessing is something that I used to do all the time. Life was a constant funk with the odd bright spot in the middle. I don’t want to go back to that life…
And yet this is common for many of us. We get into the habit of coming close to Jesus when we need something…or when we are in a meeting on Sunday. He isn’t part of the daily walk, and the routines become absent of His presence. It’s so easy to give up time with Him to pursue something else. We treat Him like an ATM machine, asking Him for something when we feel depleted, and then wondering why the account is empty. It’s because we haven’t been depositing anything into the account during the week. The account is open, and active…but we don’t get anything out of it.
Having a healthy relationship with Jesus is like having a relationship with someone else. (Except His love is unconditional.) A relationship is a daily walk. There needs to be communication, time spent together, and lots of grace and forgiveness. We can’t coast along and expect to have the same level of intimacy when the other person feels neglected and ignored. What we spend our time doing is what we then see the fruit of. If I spend my free time reading novels, watching shows, gossiping, and surfing the net, then I can expect my thoughts and actions to reflect just that.
Luke 6:44-45 “For each tree is known by its own fruit. For men do not gather figs from thorns, nor do they pick grapes from a briar bush. The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart.”
I can’t expect to grow healthy by eating fruit once a week, just like I can’t grow in my faith by just going to church once a week. It takes daily discipline. It takes accountability. And it’s worth it. As we see the burdens lighten up, and the joy bursting out, this walk with Jesus just gets better and more fulfilling.
So, what did I learn today? I learned an old lesson once again…and my day is a lot brighter. He gives daily grace. He is wanting a conversation. He is just waiting for me to look up at Him and say…”What is it that you want me to know today Lord? I am listening.”