Conversation

These last posts may have seemed a bit heavy. As I confess all my deep dark secrets the readership stops altogether! Hahaa!! I understand. I don’t know if I would want to read it either. The only reason I started this blog is because I had a few friends that encouraged it. It is good to create dialogue and maybe even get someone thinking about their own circumstances. In these 45 years I have had many a shallow conversation with people that I know have a lot more to say…why don’t we say it? Why do we become uncomfortable when the conversation touches on feelings and thoughts? Is it more important to discuss the latest celebrity gossip or what’s in fashion? There are times for these conversations as well…don’t get me wrong, I actually enjoy them…but, when there is nothing else…??

Maybe the feelings are hiding so far down that it hurts to dig them out? There was a phase in my life where I was starting to let myself feel. It was an embarrassing time in my life…I teared up at everything!!!! I mean everything! These emotions were so close to the surface that I was afraid to even say anything…I was afraid of the emotion. This process lasted for years. I fought it the whole time…and I still catch myself fighting it. I don’t want to really talk about my experiences…but after the conversation is over, and there is a lightness, it is worth it!! There is a such an amazing rush of joy when you realize that something you just opened up about is something that the other person needed to hear. Or something they confessed was just what you needed.

So…why is that I keep on the subject of open communication and honesty? I don’t know. Maybe it is something that is bubbling below the surface constantly. Maybe it is the answer to my issues with relationships . I am just preaching it to myself. I need to hear this…